Monday, November 26, 2012

Life Class in Dance Class: How Do You Face Challenges?


Life throws challenges at us every single day, some more difficult than others. Sometimes we decide to pick and choose which battles we want to fight. But it is important to realize that sometimes, the way we face even the smallest challenges reflects the way you will face the greatest challenges. Just like building muscles, confidence and habits take time to build as well!

In class, I challenge my students with pushups and splits, which is difficult even for the most physically fit. I had one student who constantly gave up after one or two pushups when tasked with doing three sets of 10; she would choose to laugh and smile after giving up every time. Of course I understand that children need time to build their muscles to do all 10 pushups, let alone three sets of them! But this was about four months into our course, and I knew this student had it in herself to do more than two.



So I finally stopped the class to address the issue. I told her - "If you give up so easily on doing 10 pushups, it is going to reflect on how you handle challenges outside of this studio. You are enabling a habit that will follow you for the rest of your life. Start creating the muscles of your mind and do not give up so easily."

The student nodded and we continued. The student completed ALL TEN PUSHUPS. I was so proud and thrilled and saw the same expression on her face. She learned the value of putting in the effort, even if it means you'll fail before reaching the goal. But she learned that if she sets her standards high, she can be the person she wanted to be - whether it is by herself, in front of a classroom or at a dance studio!

This student taught me the importance of being a teacher, even though I am teaching the art of dance, I have 1 hour in each class to find opportunities to help my dear students build skills that they can hopefully use for the rest of their lives. We have to keep paying it forward!

Monday, November 19, 2012

Life Class in Dance Class: The Power of a Smile


What's in a smile? I teach students from all kinds of backgrounds and have noticed a beautiful commonality in every child, family, area, and school - the universal language and power of a smile. 

Children may have a bad day at home, I may have a rough day, or we might be tired from other things weighing us down, but during the short time that I am with my students, I make sure that SMILING is #1 on my list, both on my face and the faces of my students. When my children share their happiness with me, I forget all my troubles and focus on the moment,  and I reach out to give them the same every day. Because we all need a break sometimes, and often when I take a step away from my troubles (even if it's only for the length of a dance class), I find that my troubles are easier to deal with!

I had a mother share a story with me about her child and how she wrote a paper in school saying that she loves and appreciates her mother so much. What stood out to me in what this little girl wrote is that she mentioned how her mom smiles all the time and that makes her happy. Who would have thought such a little thing would be appreciated so much that she would write about it? The power of a smile can be underestimated and it affects our children more than we realize. Make sure to smile a little extra today and see what happens!

Monday, November 12, 2012

Life Class in Dance Class: The Best Version of Your Child

Do not tell your children to become the best there ever was. Do not tell your children to aim for gold.

Tell them to become the best version of themselves. Tell them to challenge themselves, using only themselves as a measure of success.

I have noticed that often parents will instill a competitive nature in children. This is not a misguided goal, because setting children up with skills and habits that will bring them success in life is the best gift a parent can give. However, this often mistakenly takes the form of negative reinforcement in disguise. For one child to win, the majority must lose, and while that may seem like a great incentive to work harder, it creates a history of failure. You might be setting up your child for a cycle of hard work fueled by regret, anxiety or anger from losing.



Instead, set them up for success! By aiming to become the best version of themselves, they focus on their own improvement and celebrate success using only themselves as a measure. They embrace their unique skills and individuality instead of imitating others, which leads to better self-esteem. As an instructor, I always try to emphasize hard work, humility, and patience so my students can become the best version of themselves, without comparison to others. Positive reinforcement, all the way!

Monday, November 5, 2012

November Life Class in Dance Class

This month, I will be writing a series of blogs called 'Life Lessons in the Dance Studio' from the perspective of the students I teach. We reveal who we are the most when we are challenged, and I am blessed to be able to observe children in my classes and take some life lessons for myself from them as well.


Many times I see that children are more focused on where they are standing in the formation than their own technique. Often they worry about whether they're in the front or in the center. When dancing across the floor and learning a new technique, they pay more attention to the rest of the students' reactions to what they are doing than actually just focusing on themselves and refining their movements. Why? Why is our focus so skewed from such a young age?

These are habits and beliefs formed in the subconscious mind that can show up EVERYWHERE. And since I believe that what you focus on is what you will get - I aim to change my students' focus. I aim to clear out the distractions and help them love themselves and gain confidence instead of letting their emotions be dependent on whether they are in the center-front or if the other student approves of how they are dancing. As family, friends, mentors, and peers, we can help children understand that they are doing a wonderful job regardless of where they measure up in a group, and that it doesn't matter if they are center-front or not. If they just focus on being the best dancer they can be, people will watch them even if they are all the way in the back. 

Hard work matters and it will get recognized. But we must first start with their soul and make sure they love themselves enough to clear out all the gunk and just focus on their own beauty!

Please join me every Monday this month for more Life Lessons!