Life Class in Dance Class: The Best Version of Your Child

Do not tell your children to become the best there ever was. Do not tell your children to aim for gold.

Tell them to become the best version of themselves. Tell them to challenge themselves, using only themselves as a measure of success.

I have noticed that often parents will instill a competitive nature in children. This is not a misguided goal, because setting children up with skills and habits that will bring them success in life is the best gift a parent can give. However, this often mistakenly takes the form of negative reinforcement in disguise. For one child to win, the majority must lose, and while that may seem like a great incentive to work harder, it creates a history of failure. You might be setting up your child for a cycle of hard work fueled by regret, anxiety or anger from losing.

Instead, set them up for success! By aiming to become the best version of themselves, they focus on their own improvement and celebrate success using only themselves as a measure. They embrace their unique skills and individuality instead of imitating others, which leads to better self-esteem. As an instructor, I always try to emphasize hard work, humility, and patience so my students can become the best version of themselves, without comparison to others. Positive reinforcement, all the way!